Monday, November 28, 2011

Anono-Momma...Kids and Anatomy

Over this last Thanksgiving holiday, my kids and I went to go and visit some family. You know how it goes...

"Are we there yet?"
"I need to pee, Mom!"
"How much longer?"

And through it all...I am driving...
and driving....
and driving some more.

"Are we there?"
"Can we go home? This is taking forever!!"

Now, I actually have to pee, I am in the middle of nowhere and desperately looking for a bathroom. Can't find one anywhere...Ughhhh!

When my kids start talking about body hair...whatevs...bathroom! Yes! Jackpot!

I butt into my kids conversation and announce,"Everyone get their shoes on, we are stopping for a minute for a drink and to use the restroom." They all follow orders and are putting on their shoes. I pull in and get out. My two big kids get out of the car as I am unbuckling my 5 year old out of his car seat. He hops to the ground and asks me a question.

"Do you know what is REALLY hairy Mom?" Clearly forgetting their previous chatter...I ask "What,son?"

"V**inas!" he replies. "What? Stop it!" We are now walking into the gas station, and there are people around.

"V**inas are the hairiest things EVER!" he repeats. "Stop talking about v**inas!" I quietly tell him in a WAY stern voice. Because of course, now, people are looking.

"Do you know who has the hairiest vagina?" he asks...clearly not listening to my command of "Stop talking about va**nas"...

So I repeat..."Stop talking about va**nas!!!!"

"Daddy's v**ina is the hairiest!" he exclaims.

"Son! I don't want to hear about Daddy's v**ina right now!"

This is where the conversation FINALLY ended...BUT of course, at this point, we were IN the gas station. *SIGH*

-Mortified Momma of 3
Reader Submitted

*Have your kids ever said anything to embarass you? We want to hear about it :)

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